In Search of New Awesome Pants

I don't mind getting in better shape, and that muscles actually make you smaller...but I am down to one pair of jeans that will stay up on their own free will. It makes it very hard to put on your awesome pants when you don't have any.

So I went on a mission to find a new pair of awesome pants.

The challenge: dark denim, no saggy bottom, no pancake butts, no unfortunate wrinkles, not overly tight but tight enough to work with my (17 pairs of (I might have a problem)) boots, no holes (work appropriate), waist height appropriate, survive the sit/squat/bend-over test, loose enough on my thighs but tight enough at my waist, and good quality.

I failed miserably.

I am completely bamboozled by womens' pants sizing. Some size 6s were too big and some 8s to small. I tried juniors and misses, stretch and non-stretch, bootcut and skinny. You'd think being a smaller size would mean shopping for clothes is more fun... but it was an exhausting and frustrating experience.  

There was also an unfortunate incident in one dressing room where the "skinny" part of the skinny jeans got stuck on my calf muscle. It's a good thing I do yoga because that took some serious effort to get off. I was worried I'd have to hobble out with a pair of jeans around my calves and ask for help...or scissors. Yet ironically that pair looked good on the upper half of my legs. So apparently you can have quads but not calves.

I have tried on 35 pairs of jeans in the last week. I bought one pair. It was #25 of the Great Jeans Try-On of 2011. I wore that pair today, and I'm irked because by the end of the day they had stretched out and I had to walk around the store holding them up with my thumbs in the belt loops!!! The whole point of getting new jeans was to get a pair that wouldn't fall off. Erg.

If I had more pumpkin pie I would eat it to curb my frustration. And make my old awesome pants fit. But I don't and I won't. And I won't give up just yet...after all, there are 17 pairs of boots in my closet that need wearing...

My Nutrition Experiment

I've enjoyed eating "normally" again...but I've noticed something. My tummy hurts. All the time. 

As a result, I'm conducting two experiments on myself.

The first one is tracking my body's reaction to foods as I try them again. This is how the doctor figured out I'm allergic to Splenda (nasty chemical stuff anyway) but since I've eaten pretty darn clean for the last few months I'm noticing a lot of reactions upon reintroducing those old foods. Wheat seems to be the worst for me - a combination of stomach pain and bloating. And what woman likes that? 

So far on my bad list: 

• Wheat bran and flour - I baked muffins this week. It was not good.
• Pizza - same as the muffins
• Mike & Ike's - I broke out in a rash
• Bread (I'm sad that the delicious pumpkin bread did not like me as much as I liked it)

Maybe I reacted this way before I started dieting for the competition - I just ate it so regularly that I thought it was normal to feel that way. Actually now that I think about it, I know I had the same reactions before. They're just markedly stronger now. 

 

On the plus side peanut M&Ms seem to be ok. As do rice cakes and peanut butter and my morning oatmeal. Phew.

The second experiment is carb cycling. This article kind of gives you an overview: Bodybuilding.com Carb Cycling. Basically you have high, low, and no carb days each week. As the article says, we are always "battling homeostasis" and cycling carbs keeps your body guessing. I'm kind of at a sticking point so I know I need to do something different. 

My diet is going to look something like this: 

• Monday/Thursday = No carb (green veggies only)
• Tuesday/Friday/Sunday = Low carb 
• Wednesday/Saturday = High carb 
• Every day must have 1g of protein per lb of bodyweight

Of course this week I'm going to make Thanksgiving a high carb day. What I like about this cycling idea is it doesn't cut out any main food groups for a long period of time. I think variety is important in your diet. In addition, while I know my body responds better to low carb diets but that can get mentally exhausting after a long period, so knowing that I'll have a high carb day soon (instead of 3 months from now) should make it easier to stick with the plan! 

So those are my experiments in a nutshell (good thing nuts are ok in small amounts!). Applied science is fun! 

How to Win a Plank Off

I've woken up every day since Monday thinking it's Friday...I needed a break. So tonight was yoga time! I broke out my P90X Yoga dvd, which is one of my all-time favorite workouts and rolled my mat out in the living room.

Now, don't think yoga is just sitting with your legs cross-legged and meditating. There are different types of yoga. Hatha is the gentle kind that most people think of as yoga. Then there's Bikram, which is done in 90 degree rooms. I tried a Hatha class in college once but it wasn't for me. I spent the entire hour thinking about how I wasn't getting a decent workout and about everything else I had to do. But that's my fault. I have a hard time sitting still. My favorite kind is "power yoga" which is a series of poses that require a great deal of strength and balance. It's fast enough to keep me from getting bored, and yet still relaxing. You will notice your results pretty quickly if you're doing it regularly - and I love to do it after a kickboxing class - get those muscles warm and then stretch them out.

Dogs...demonstrating Downward Dog and Upward Dog

It is NOT girly at all - if you're doing it right, you'll break a sweat. Even my husband will do it with me. I also believe it contributed to my win in last week's bootcamp plank-off over Jose. If you can do a series of power yoga poses for an hour, you can do a 5 minute plank.

Sorry, had to pop that picture in there for Jose. I've been giving him a hard time all week. LOL.

Try to hold the plank for 5 minutes. It's hard. My arms were shaking so hard for an hour afterward I think I scared the checkout girl at the grocery store. Think of your body as a board (or a plank really, hence the name), nice and straight. Squeeze your glutes and make sure your bum's not sticking up in the air (that's dolphin pose, not plank). If you can't do it on your toes, use your knees, but again, you should be super straight from your shoulders to your knees. It's an amazing total body exercise- arms, back, abs, butt, quads, calves...and a lot of it is mental strength to hold it! Do it during one commercial break a day.

Namaste and plank away. :)

A Post for My Legs

I'm dedicating today's post to my legs.

They've been kicked, bruised, skinned, scraped, torn, sprained, strained, and broken. They’ve held me up for hours each workday in 3+ inch heels. They've carried the rest of me for miles and miles on the soccer field, on the running trails, on my spinner, on my mountain bike.

And what have I done for them?

Made them run harder, ride farther and spin longer. Hidden their soccer war wounds under long pants. Worn higher and higher heels. Walked on broken bones. And they keep taking it.

Worse, I’ve been ashamed of them! I’ve never ever had what you would call thin legs. I am what is fondly called a “pear.” I’ve had some serious calves and quads since kindergarten. I ended up in physical therapy in 8^th grade because my quads were so much stronger than my hamstrings that they were pulling my kneecaps off track. I wore baggy pants and long shorts to hide them. I got in the back row of pictures so they wouldn’t be seen. Then while I was looking at the pictures from the competition, I suddenly realized that they were the part of me I am most proud of. 

My dear legs, I apologize.

I’m proud of you.

You are full of dedication, power, and strength.

You look good in a skirt, in jeans, in tall boots and in dress pants.

You can kick a soccer ball 50 miles an hour and roundhouse kick someone in the head.

You help me move furniture at 2am when I get the urge to rearrange it.

You help lift laundry, vacuums, and groceries up and down the stairs.

You keep getting stronger at squats, leg presses, and deadlifts.

You can jump the 3-foot plyo box, lunge a football field, and sprint with a weight sled.

You help me dig in clay soil, carry trees, and haul bags of dirt so my garden can bloom.

You held me up for 5 minutes to win the “plank-off” challenge today.

Even if you aren’t what some would call the perfect legs, you are perfect for me.

I’m sorry it took me so long to realize that. 

Be kind to your body, even the parts you don’t think you like. It’s all you’ve got. 

How to Be Amazing...step one

11/11/11...the 93rd anniversary of the end of WWI. Armistice Day, Remembrance Day, Veteran's Day. Thank you to those who have served, past and present. I cannot wait to see my hubby again. I teared up at every picture I saw online today.

This week has been a blur. Having to cut water the day before and of the show definitely did a number on me...I've been so sleepy all week. I was expecting cravings after being allowed to eat carbs for a few days...but I was not expecting to be so darned tired. Combine that with chilly fall weather and I have been dragging myself out of bed just to jog the dog a mile...forget my usual long morning cardio session.

But having a break has been good, both mentally and physically. I hit the gym for legs tonight and was able to go up increase my weight on all my exercises. I'll be waddling tomorrow at kickboxing. The trick is making sure a "break" doesn't turn into a long sabbatical. So it's back to the gym, back to the diet, back to the blog! Consistency and accountability!

And in other news, 2012 is creeping up on us! Which means another chance for New Year's resolutions! Well if you wait till January 1st you're already behind. So I ordered Chalene Johnson's new ebook, Push Jump Start, which was just released today. She's following it up with a hard copy book in December. But for the next 30 days each "chapter" in this ebook has a life homework assignment to set and achieve your goals. It's an expanded version of the short goal program I did last January...which got me in the best shape of my life.

Because, as the picture says, Amazing People Do Not Just Happen! 

First assignment is brainstorming and deciding your life priorities, because if you don't know your priorities, how can you decide what your goals are going to be? Your priorities are your values, your principles, what you want people to remember you for. Off to work! I encourage you to do the same. :)

It Will Never Be

Reblogging this from http://nerdfitness.com/blog/2011/11/07/it-will-never-be/ because I love it! 

It will never be:

• easy
• perfect
• the right time

Nobody is going to:

• tell you exactly what to do
• drag you out of bed in the morning
• yell at you to eat healthy
• lift weights for you
• run a race for you

There will always be:

• holidays
• sick days
• sleepless nights
• early mornings
• vacations
• bad weather
• long days at the office

It will always be easier to:

• say no
• hit SNOOZE
• do nothing
• settle
• blame others
• make excuses
• give up
• say “I tried my best” when you really didn’t

Life is freaking tough - health, wealth, and happiness certainly don’t come easy.

For those reasons, you don’t need:

• The best equipment
• The best business plan
• The PERFECT workout program (it doesn’t exist)
• A super specific meal plan

And it’s okay to:

• not have all of the answers yet – NOBODY does
• not have your life completely figured out yet – NOBODY does
• get started and figure things out as you go

As Teddy Roosevelt once said, “Do the best you can, with what you have, where you are.”

Take action.  Make changes.

You will make mistakes.   You will fail. Embrace it.

You know what’s NOT okay?

• to expect instant success and gratification
• to give up immediately when life doesn’t go your way
• to keep doing the same thing while expecting different results
• to coast through life while complaining about it
• to constantly wonder “what if” without ever finding out

Tomorrow never comes. 

Eventually never happens.

Today.

Now.

Shut up and start.

-Steve http://nerdfitness.com/blog/2011/11/07/it-will-never-be/

Happiness is a Pumpkin Spice Latte

...well a pumpkin spice latte with nonfat milk and sugar-free cinnamon dolce syrup. Even better, I found out today that a tall Starbucks latte with pumpkin spices, nonfat milk, and the sugar-free cinnamon dolce syrup (and no whipped cream) is...wait for it...a whopping 90 calories! It's also way less sweet than the regular version. Woo hoo! The guy at Starbucks asked me how I was doing while I was waiting for my drink and I think I scared him when I told him I'd been dreaming about this day for 3 months.

Well my two treat days are coming to an end, and to be honest,  I'm okay with that and looking forward to getting back on my routine. As delicious as my French toast breakfast and spaghetti dinner were, my stomach is rather angry with me and I don't feel all that good. I've actually had a major headache for the last two days.

And so another 7 lbs of chicken breast are grilled, yams are sliced and baked with cinnamon, asparagus is steamed, egg whites are stocked up, and oatmeal is measured into to-go containers for work.

But I think I'll save room for my favorite pumpkin spice treat...

Go Figure!

So it was the big weekend - my very first NPC figure competition. And what a weekend it was!

Friday afternoon we drove up to Phoenix to get settled in. First order of business was registration, which involved a long line, signing in, receiving the usual event t-shirt/tank top, and being measured for sorting by height class sorting. Bodybuilders also have to strip down to their undies and weigh in. Everyone was really nice but you could definitely tell that they were all sizing up the competition.

Next order of business was spray tanning, which basically involved being sprayed the darkest shade of spray tan possible. So I basically went from being pretty darn pale to a deep golden brown. It actually wasn't that orange, so I didn't look like an oompa loompa, just super duper dark! But you have to go darker than you think you need to - if it looks ridiculous in person it will look natural on stage. It's rather inconvenient - you can't get it wet or it will run (and of course we had the first rain in Phoenix in a few months that night), it stains any light-colored material, and if you put on deodorant your armpits will turn green. It also smells awful, although that fortunately fades after being surrounded by another 200 non-deodoranted people for a weekend.

Saturday morning was a mandatory athlete's meeting where they went over the show rules and assigned your numbers and height classes. I ended up in the tallest figure class, Open Figure E.  Then it was back to the hotel to do hair and makeup. Getting dolled up was a huge part of the fun. I don't get to curl and tease my hair, wear fake eyelashes, a ton of makeup, and rhinestone jewelry on a usual workday.

We walked back across the street to the Arts Center and Figure A was lining up backstage so I luckily didn't have much time to worry and stress myself out since I pretty much had to get in line and walk out on stage for judging. I spent hours practicing my poses and when I actually went out there to do them it only took a matter of minutes. I was shaking so hard from nerves and my cheeks were quivering from holding my smile so long. I kept wondering if I hit all the poses right, did I flex all the right muscles? And I need to flex, because I don't have nearly as much muscle definition as some of the girls that have been doing this for a while. But I have something to work towards!

Woman in gold bikini is 62!

After prejudging we got lunch and then had another athlete's meeting. The night show started at six and figure was scheduled to go on stage at 7, so again I didn't have to wait and stress too long. The nice thing about the night show is there isn't any judging. Instead it's about entertaining the audience and introducing all the athletes who've worked so hard. I liken it to a recital - you spend months training and dieting and this is your chance to show off your hard work. So in the night show you walk out one at a time in your class and the MC reads off a bio sheet on you. There are some amazing stories - people losing 100 lbs, a bikini competitor with 6 kids, a 29 year old who recovered from a total hip replacement, a 62-year old fitness competitor with a six pack. It was the time to recognize everyone's hard work and dedication.

While I was super nervous in morning prejudging, at the night show I felt completely relaxed and at ease on the stage. You can hear everyone cheering and your bio is being read and you just bask in that moment. This has been such a big "bucket list" goal for almost 9 years...and now I can cross it off! You can tell from my big smile in the pic that I was actually enjoying myself in the night show. They only announce the top five in each class and I didn't place but honestly for my first show I wasn't expecting to - I just wanted to do my best and see how it all went down.

It was a HUGE adrenaline rush!


So what did I get out of this whole crazy experience?

• I lost 20 lbs and 4 dress sizes - and a need to shop for a whole new wardrobe
• I proved to myself that I can stick to a diet and workout routine
• Conquering a huge fear - getting up on a stage and being judged is pretty intimidating
• Friendships with the other girls, Martha and Val, and our amazing trainer Joni, and Gina and Terry who spent their weekend working hard to make sure we didn't have anything to stress about - and to make sure we had more than enough fun after! You ladies are wonderful!
• Amazing support from my friends and family - all your wonderful comments really helped get me through this! Also a thank you to Princecella, Eva, Susanne, Maricela, and Elvia who came to cheer us on! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!

And I want to do it again in 4 weeks...Los Angeles anyone? 

Packing for the Gun Show

We leave for the show tomorrow! My terror is turning more into excitement, especially as I get things ready in my little suitcase. Obviously, food is going to take up the most room. Chicken, asparagus, celery, more chicken, tuna, and of course, treats...priorities people!

So what else do we have?
* Blinged out two piece posing suit
* Blingy jewelry to go with blingy suit
* Double sided tape to avoid wardrobe malfunctions
* Cover up robe
* 5" clear heels (also very useful if you need to reach a high shelf or clean the top of your refrigerator)
* Gum
* More gum
* Sewing kit (because there's not a lot of room for loose threads with a posing suit)
* Black pants and black long-sleeved shirt to sleep in after being shellacked with spray tan
* Flip flops
* Reading material (for all the sitting around between shows)
* Camera
* Hairspray, hair brush, hair straightener...I do have a lot of hair to do
* Fake eyelashes
* Makeup
* Band-aids (not for anything show-related, just because I'm a klutz)
* Water

And of course...supplies for my peanut butter rice cakes and money for my post-show pumpkin spice latte.

I'm getting excited now and part of that excitement is that it's going to be a really fun girls' weekend with some amazing ladies! We've worked hard and now we're going to show it off. :D

Wish us luck!

I Dream of Rice Cakes...and Oatmeal

I'd like to point out that this week's crazy diet is just that...the final week crazy diet.

Most of the time I follow a pretty balanced and filling high protein diet...we're talking 2000+ calories. I even have "cheat days" but I like to call them "treat days." So when Texas Roadhouse opens in December, I'll be saving one of those treat days for a sweet potato and one of their amazing rolls (which are 120 calories apiece, so treat is the right word).

My favorite breakfast is a cup of hot oatmeal with a teaspoon of cinnamon and a handful of raspberries, along with five egg whites. I just get those liquid egg whites and nuke them in the microwave for two minutes with some ground red pepper. The egg whites smell awful (you know, the kind of smell that makes your coworkers comment) so I eat those pretty quick and then take my time with my oatmeal, savoring each hot cinnamony bite.

And to think, I wasn't a fan of oatmeal before.

If you need some oatmeal ideas, one of my new favorite cookbooks is 75 Ways to Love Your Oatmeal by Jenny Grothe. The hubby is going to be getting a lot of oatmeal when he's back from this deployment. But who can resist things like "Raspberry Cheescake Baked Oatmeal", "Baked Banana Oatmeal in Rum", "Black Forest Baked Oatmeal", and "Pumpkin Pie Baked Oatmeal"? Best part is the author is also a figure competitor, CrossFitter, and marathon runner, so all the recipes are bodybuilding friendly. I've discovered a whole world of sugar-free Torani syrups and cheesecake flavor drops...

(While I'm on this final week crazy diet I spend a lot of time looking at recipe books and food magazines. You'd think it'd be torture but it actually kind of helps.)

Speaking of pumpkin, my wonderful friend Candee from bootcamp surprised me with a care package today, which included CoffeeMate Pumpkin Spice creamer, rice cakes, peanut butter, and chocolate covered raisins.  Thank you Candee!!! It totally touched my heart and made my day. :D

I can hardly wait to have a rice cake with peanut butter and raisins on Sunday!!! That is my favorite mid-afternoon snack. Try it, it will really help you get through that 3 o'clock slump.

Today was much better. Things are looking up.

Three days.

Running Out of Gas

This final countdown to the show diet has me running out of gas...literally. I didn't even notice my gas light was on last week while I was driving to work. I've never done that before; I usually fill up when I have a quarter tank left. Lucky for me there was a Circle K just up the road to roll into. That was also the same day I put raspberries in my egg whites instead of my oatmeal. The following day I completely forgot my purse, wallet and all, when I left the house.  All you need to get going are your car keys and phone. At least I didn't run out of gas AND leave my wallet at home on the SAME day.


You'd think I'd learn my lesson, but nope, tonight I was coasting into a gas station again.

So why am I doing such stupid things? I'm pretty sure it's because my carb intake just went to 100% green veggies.

You see, your body really likes glucose. Glucose, good old sugar, is the easiest thing for your body to use as fuel, and all carbs are eventually broken down into glucose. And the human body has evolved to be very energy efficient (aka "lazy"). If you're getting enough carbs to provide it with easy energy, it slows production of the enzymes and hormones that help break down non-carb sources of energy, like fat. Stop eating the same amount of carbs and you have to get that energy from somewhere else, only now your body isn't prepared to break down those other sources. Your body will eventually adapt, so long as you keep feeding it non-carb food, it will produce more enzymes and get better at getting the energy it needs. It just takes a while to get there...

You'll also notice if you have more sugar one day, you'll have cravings the next day...because your darn body knows it's alot easier to digest sugars and it wants more.

I kind of got over the low-energy hump and I've moved onto the emotional outburst hump.

I almost lost it in the grocery store when the woman next to me kept humming! Humming!!! It was like she was mocking me with her humming, I'm pretty sure that she was humming because she was so happy to be buying pasta as I was on my way to get more tuna. Really, I knew I was being ridiculous but I just got so stressed and irritated from her humming.

Then at the gym tonight I was on the incline press and I was thinking that I wanted to lift heavier but of course my hubby is gone so I didn't have a spotter and I just burst into tears. I'm pretty sure I scared all the guys in the weight area.  I should've disguised my sobs with some loud grunting and throwing some weights down.

Now tonight I'm cooking a bunch of food for a work party...food that I can't eat. My house smells like sauteed onions and garlic and tomatoes and beef and I can't have any of it.

It was a really stressful day and I'm fighting off a head cold that even my beloved Netipot isn't doing much for and I gave in and had peanut M&Ms. :(  I know, I feel bad and it's my butt on stage in 4 days. But I'm just being honest and I'm not beating myself up for it. Just got to do better tomorrow. Hopefully I didn't upset too many people today. If I did, I'm sorry. Dear people, I love you. If I try to bite your head off, know it's not me. Blame evolution.

Four days.